The Benefits of a First Look on a Wedding Day
I have confessed my deep love for “First Looks” numerous times and there is a reason for this. They’re AWESOME! However, not everyone is aware of how awesome they are because they get caught up in how “non-traditional” it is and they immediately write it off. I can completely relate to this because I did NOT have a first look when I got married! Now after seeing all of the amazing first looks that I’ve photographed, I SO wish I had that same moment with my wife on our wedding day.
You see, most if not ALL brides want a huge reaction from their groom when they see them walk down the aisle. But there’s one big thing missing - guys are typically not that emotional! Especially when they’re put on the spot and in front of all of their closest friends and family. Now, this isn’t true for EVERY groom, but more often than not, I don’t see a big reaction from them. Now how is a First Look different? Well, it’s more intimate and the groom has an easier time to let their guard down. I ALWAYS get an emotional reaction from the groom during a First Look. And it’s in a controlled environment where I can ensure perfect picture quality and grab multiple angles. This can’t be said for the ceremony. And you know what? Grooms who do a First Look still have a reaction when they see their bride walk down the aisle! You get the best of both worlds!!! Also, you get MORE photos of just the two of you! Around 30% more photos compared if there’s no First Look.
After experiencing my own wedding and shooting a bunch of others.... I’ve come to this conclusion. Some brides love “traditions”.... but what a bride REALLY wants when it comes to her groom seeing her for the first time, is a REACTION. Those who are not interested in a First Look usually think that by seeing each other beforehand, they will lose part of that reaction. They also assume that it will not be as emotional or as intimate as it would be if they were coming down the aisle.
What I have found (this is starting to sound like a research paper!) is the opposite! Everyone knows that wedding days are a bit stressful for the bride and groom. The whole day is focused on them, they need to look their best, they need to be on time, the groom has no idea what side the boutonniere is supposed to go on and little by little... the tension grows.
It’s before the ceremony and the gravity of what is about to happen starts to sink in and the calm, collected groom who was playing golf just a few short hours ago is now starting to feel a little anxious. So what happens next? The groom waits in a little room somewhere for his que from the coordinator. It seems like it’s taking FOREVER. Finally, the coordinator leans her head in and hurries the groom to get ready. With clammy hands, the groom enters the ceremony and what does he find? .... he finds anywhere from 50-300 people and they’re all looking where? Right at his face... because everyone has expectations and anticipation about his first reaction. This is the farthest thing from a private, intimate moment. Sure, it’s SO powerful and SO wonderful... I already said that walking down the aisle was one of the BEST PARTS of the WHOLE wedding day!! It’s magical!! But the nerves are REAL. Palms are sweaty, meatballs and spaghetti... but a First Look reduces pressure and that’s when true emotions are free to be expressed.
So if I were to condense what I just wrote... basically, Grooms normally become incredibly nervous on wedding days... even if they seem cool and collected.
For most grooms, the nerves kick in before they see their bride because when they see her, everything becomes VERY real! So when the nerves start creeping up, instead of keeping the groom in a secluded space until his time to enter the ceremony, what if you took him to a private place... no people, no on-lookers, no distractions... and you let his beautiful bride, the love of his life, quietly call his name and have him turn around to see her for the first time. He would turn around and finally get his first look at his stunning bride and not only would he get to see her... he could embrace her... cry with her... kiss her... and ENJOY that moment with her for as LONG as they wanted. As she shows him her dress, twirls a few times and then asks him what he thinks... his nerves start to diminish. After all, she’s the one who can make him the most comfortable anyway.
Because they aren’t on a time crunch... they casually move into their romantic portraits. No one is around, the coordinator isn’t announcing “15 minutes left”, and there is no pressure. It’s just the two of them and their photographer... capturing the excitement and the joy of their wedding day. This is their time to be TOGETHER... and to be ALONE. When does that happen on a wedding day? Without a First Look... it doesn’t. After their romantic portraits are done, they meet up with their best friends. Their bridal party joins them and because they still have plenty of time to spare... the bride touches up a little makeup while the boys act like boys. After a few minutes the bridal party portraits begin and they’re FUN. They’re fun because there is time to make them fun.
There aren’t any guests waiting impatiently at the cocktail hour and there isn’t a DJ coming to find the photographer to get a time check. It’s wonderful!
After portraits are done the girls and guys separate and prepare for the ceremony. The guests begin to arrive and the ushers are in place. Pretty soon it’s time for the processional music to begin and one by one, the bridesmaids make their way down to the front of the ceremony. As the groom clasps his hands... they aren’t clasped out of nervousness, but excitement. The music builds, the mother of the bride stands and all of the guests follow her lead. The groom looks up, and here comes the BRIDE!!! His best friend, his companion, his sweetheart... she’s stunning... ABSOLUTELY stunning. The closer she gets, the bigger he smiles.
Now let me put a disclaimer on here before we continue... my clients are not required to do a First Look by any means! I used to feel bad for sharing this option with couples who were against it, because I didn’t want to push anything on them. However, I’ve seen the benefits of a First Look over and over again, and so I only share this because I want the BEST for my couples!! It’s totally ok if couples choose not to share a First Look! It’s just my preference to do one for many reasons...
For brides not interested in a First Look, then it’s important to talk with your photographer to make sure there’s enough time AFTER the ceremony and before the reception for bride/groom photos, bridal party photos, and family formals. I typically recommend around 2 hours from the end of the ceremony to the start of cocktail hour, but every wedding is unique so your circumstances may be slightly different.
I hope this has been helpful if you’re currently trying to decide whether you want to do a First Look or not! Let me know if you have any questions!